The Happy Farmer Comes Home From Work

The Biodata entry, which I thought was hysterical, garnered a lot of wonderful responses. Thanks to those of you who showed concern for my self worth. It comes and goes, you know, like everything. Its good, I think, keeps you humble and doing the internal work that it takes to keep you on the right path in these dark weird days. Its very challenging to keep clear what is real and what is marketing, especially in NYC where so much of the city is made up of marketing and you start to think that that is what you wanted in the first place, and what you wanted is actually...impossible. Its a very shapeshifty place, New York. My dad wrote me a wonderful letter after he read what I had written. He has a strong sensibility about what is real and what is a thin illusory veneer apt to fall away and leave you at any moment. I remember one of his car lectures, which stands out as being personal to our family and not topical (ie about a specific orchestral peice or composer.) It was about the family being like a ship, that each person on the ship has to do their job and make sure that everyone knows what the other one is doing and by all working in unity, the ship sails smoothly, but if one person isnt doing their job then the ship can become lost at sea and be unable to reach any destination, leaving the family adrift on a deep and uncompassionate ocean. At least thats how i remember it, it may not have really been that metaphor at all...but i do remember some kind of boat analogy. Dad, do you remember what that was?? Anyway, he is also wonderful writer, so Ive posted the letter for you to read. He loves me a lot, I dont think Im on the Gandhi level just yet. But perhaps you can see past that and feel a little more secure in your own priorities and accomplishments. I did. Oh yes, The Happy Farmer Comes Home From Work was a piano peice my dad played at his first recital when he was little, how adorable. It sounds Zen. When have I felt like playing a little tune as come home from work? Its been... a while. But its key, being happy with simplicity is key! We can all be Happy Farmers, just have to lobotomize that marketing absorbent lobe of our brains and come back to whats really going on: Love and Compassion.


My dearest Vivi,
I have often told the story of my tucking you in when you were
three, switching off the light, and then being stopped at the door by your
question, "Daddy, why is life important?" The answer I gave then, which was
the only answer I was capable of giving, was that all living things seem to
want more than anything to continue living. Thus, we must conclude that
life is important. It was true in a hollow, non-commital sort of way, but I
am able to do better now.
Your latest blog entry suggests that you are questioning the value
of the way you have spent your time up to this point, and feeling that
others have done more or done better. Let me remind you, my dearest
daughter, of what is true, or at least confirm what you already know, which
is that love is absolutely the only thing that gives meaning to our lives.
Love is the benevolent extension of ourselves into the lives of others, and
the willing acceptance of others as inseparable parts of ourselves. You
have always been one of the most loving people I have ever known. It
animates everything you do, and provides the impetus to everything you do.
You have lightened and enlightened the lives of everyone you have ever
closely touched, most especially those of me and Mommy and Ariel, to whom
you are our sun and moon.
Your Grandpa got up early every weekday morning for thirty years,
leaving the house by 6:00, so that he could be at his office by 7. After
getting home just in time for dinner, he would disappear again into the den
for up to two hours, making calls to customers for their weekly orders.
What remains of all that labor? Who besides me and Nana remembers it or
cares about it? Who would cry to learn that my Dad was dead, if that were
all he ever did? In fact, however, many cried at the news of his death, and
continue to mourn him, because of the love he showed constantly both to
those who were close to him, and to those he had never met.
The power of Jesus and of Gandhi had nothing to do with degrees they
earned or lofty positions they attained in the government or commerce of
their day. They had nothing, earned nothing, and, by certain standards, did
practically nothing. They attained unimaginable greatness not in spite of
this, but because of it.
The material world is powerful. It wants us to feel needs that do
not exist, and then devote our lives to fulfilling them. You know this
honey, so don't feel bad because you have listened to your heart, which is
filled with good, and tried to steer clear of the false goals and cheesy
achievements the world uses to lure you into feeding its insatiable hunger
for wealth. You see all this with wonderful clarity, and express it so ably
in your writing, but I know that is always much easier in regarding other
people than it is with yourself. Take it from me, Vivi, who knows you very
deeply and loves you very deeply, that through a world riddled with pitfalls
and temptations, you have threaded your way to becoming an admirable and
powerful person. You radiate into the lives of your friends, family, and
casual acquaintances, love that will never die.
X's and O's
Dad