Brotherhood of the Crazy Hats

I have really been hating New York lately. Its absolutely fucking freezing, you have to cover every inch of your body for fear of frostbite. Homeless people have snot icicles hanging from their nostrils and all the rich women look like blonde bears in their 50,000 dollar furs. All the train lines are under construction, it took me two and a half horrible and chilly hours to get home from the upper east side yesterday, i wont bother detailing why but sufficed to say i was the public curser on the train that night! Ben is out of town on tour in Europe and im crazily getting ready for going to Senegal on my own. The only thing I like about this winter is my hat. Last year i bought this brown knit hat with a huge row of tufts down the middle that looks like a trojan helmet. Its very warm and cozy, with two added benefits: people's reactions to me are GREAT! One guy actually clucked and pucocked at me on the street, two brooklyn kids burst out laughing hysterically and doubling over, people love it and love to hate it. Secondly is that in NY there is a secret brotherhood of those of us bold enough to wear truly crazy hats. There are many, one girl had an oversized white knit hat with a huge tassel on top and the side braids came down to her waist, a japanese guy in union square had a hat that was a bear's head, a woman in the bleeker station had a huge rainbow fur cylinder on her head, she smiled at me warmly as she walked through the open doors of the six, mahdis wears a crazy thick fake fur wraparound hat that looks terrific. The wealthy upper east side women who wear inanely huge beaver and ermine hats are exempt because they dont think theyre hats are crazy, they have a totally distorted idea of what kind of outerwear the rest of the world employs. And they spend too much money on them to consider them eccentric. Its like an enclave of russian aristocrats from the 17oos. Anyway, the real members of the brotherhood acknowledge each other, like black men, and volkswagen owners. Like, I see you baby, nice hat.